You Can’t Make This Shit Up

In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy 120 proof Spirit . . . .

It must be really hard to start a new church.  There are a good number of goats out there (and goats are impossible to lead (kind of like cats)).  A new church needs sheep.  And let’s face it:  in any community, the number of sheep stays pretty steady.  In many, it is dropping.  Few, if any, non-believers (goats) are going to join the fold.  You might get some interdenominational transfers or converts from other religions, but your pool of sheep is limited.

Our Godly American Heritage thinks the Constitution is Wrong!

From the Idaho Press-Tribune (via Americans United for Separation of Church and State):

A 77-year-old retired teacher by the name of Chuck Sheldon, founder and executive director of Our Godly American Heritage, has decided that public schools should be allowed to teach the Bible. 

A Christian (a)Salt on Cooking

Christians (at least, the fundogelical Christianist dominionist asswipe types) keep missing the point.  I use kosher salt for a couple of reasons — it dissolves more quickly in bread dough (not sure if it does, but my bread rises better when I use kosher salt), I can sprinkle it on vegetables before they steam and it doesn’t fall off, and, well, because of the shape and texture of the crystals, I can use less (and still get the same effect) when grilling a nice ribeye, or chicken breast, or (shocking) a nice pork fillet.  I use kosher salt for its cooking properties.  I do not use it to show up Christianity.

Faith and Freedom Institute Wants Neither

A new group, The Faith and Freedom Institute, has decided to fill in the vacuum of evangelical leadership created by the semi-retirement of James Dobson.  The FFI will combat “satanic wickedness” and will return America to a foundation of Biblical principles.

All Non-Christians are Atheists?

Did you know that atheists are not a minority in the world?   I didn’t, either.  How could I have missed this?  Who are all these atheists?

Noah’s Ark Was Found. Two Years Ago. Really.

Those morons turkeys I wrote about a few days ago are looking in the wrong place.  Hell, they’re looking in the wrong country.  At least according to an expedition a little over two years ago.  At least, according to B.A.S.E. (The Biblical Archeology Search and Exploration Institute).  Here is an article from Good Morning America (2006) (My snark has been added):

 

Has Noah’s Ark Been Found?  (I’m Guessing No)

Noah’s Ark Will Be Found. Again. Really.

For as long as I can remember, Noah’s Ark seems be found about every other year.  Sometimes they have found the mountain. Sometimes, they have found the actual ark.  The only consistent part of the story is Ararat —  Mount Ararat, or the Ararat Mountains, or the Mountains in Ararat.  Now it would appear that Liberty University has gotten into the act.