Bishop allows villagers to notice ‘reality of nature’

10 August, 2009

A small village in Switzerland has, collectively, spent the last 331 or so years praying for one thing.  Now they are petitioning the Vatican to reverse their prayers (from Yahoo News (via the AP)):

Since the vow was established in 1678, the deal was simple: the citizens of the isolated mountain hamlets of Fiesch and Fieschertal would pledge to lead virtuous lives. In exchange, God would spare their homes and livelihoods from being swallowed by Europe’s largest glacier as it expanded toward the valley with heavy winter snows.


Conservation body Pro Natura says the glacier base is receding up the mountain by about 100 feet (30 meters) a year. University of Zurich geographer Hanspeter Holzhauser estimates the river of ice has retreated 2.1 miles (3.4 kilometers) since peaking in 1860 at a length of 14 miles (23 kilometers). Nearly half of the shrinkage has happened since 1950.


Villagers should continue with the vow, but the request for divine assistance should be adjusted to conform with the changing reality of nature, the pastor said.

“Praying should of course continue, because our villages should be spared from natural catastrophes,” Venetz said in his sermon. “We should at the same time pray that our glacier does not melt any further, but instead grows, and that the most important thing in life — water — remains well preserved.”

He said he would ask the local bishop to seek Pope Benedict XVI’s permission to change the vow, and a statement from the cantonal (state) government of Valais said a papal audience was planned for September or October.

Remember, of course, that back in March, the Pope issued an expansion pack of sins.  These new sins included genetic manipulation (including in vitro treatment of genetic disorders) and an admonition to not contribute to anthropogenic global warming.  And, in view of that last suggestion, the citizens of Fiesch and Fieschertal will now pray for the preservation of the glacier.

Let me get this straight:  for 331 years they prayed to keep the glacier away from the village.  Now that their prayer has been answered (albeit in a totally man-made way (in exactly the same way it would have happened if god(s) did/does not exist)), they change their minds?

I thought the key to the whole god(s) thing is the eternal nature of the god(s)-like thingies.  As it was, as it is, as it shall be, for ever and ever, for all eternity.  I’ve heard tell that god(s) like consitency.  He/she/they/it likes people who don’t change their minds, right?

So do you suppose this psychopathic (and if you think that’s too strong, just read the Old Testament) supernatural and mythical being will just figurativily smile, say, “My bad,” and ‘fix’ things?   Will the almighty allow his people to actually notice reality?   Or will the glacier, under the continued pressures of AGW, destroy the villages with a flash flood under the guise of, of course, diving retribution.

Or the more likely explanation (requiring no supernatural god(s) thingies):  the village lucked out (though with all the floods and other disasters, it sounds like my form of luck) for 300 or so years and now that the planet may become less hospitable for human life, the villagers have suddenly discovered that they need the glacier.

Your choice.



  1. Maybe they were just so virtuous that they overshot their request. Maybe sinning would help. 😉

  2. How much sinning can you do in a small Swiss village?

    • You’d be surprised what one can do with a pair of Leiderhosen, a bag of Ricola cough drops and a semi-willing partner.

      • What about the Alphorn? I’m sure there’s some way one could sin with that, right?

      • You dirty, dirty thing. I didn’t expect to click on that link and find porn!

  3. Which combination would be better, Alphorn + Altoids, or Alphorn + Ricola?

    • Considering that Altoids are not only curiously strong, but they are also ENGLISH, not Swiss, I would say that the Alphorn + Ricola would be better.

      Postie: Big, aren’t they?

      • Yes they are, Thank you.

        Oh, you were talking about those horn thingies.


  4. (((Billy))):
    I guess if one is a purist, Alphorn + Ricola is the only way to go. If one is more eclectic, however….

    • Eclectic is one thing. Adding Altoids? That’s just downright neocon Republican. Perverse. Disgusting. etc.

      • Altoids are awesome. Wait, did I just say that out loud?

      • I meant with the alphorn. Alone, they are great. Not with the alphorn, though.

      • They are especially good with the Alphorn. You should try it sometime. 🙂

  5. I meant with the alphorn. Alone, they are great. Not with the alphorn, though.

    That depends on your point of view. 😉

    • Kinky.

      And the next comment will be the Big Boy comment: comment number 4884.

  6. Er… 4,884? Is there a prize involved?

  7. Postie: You were 4885. And no prize. Do you even know what 4-8-8-4 and Big Boy mean? Or do you have a life?

    MO was actually the 4884th comment.

    • I don’t have the faintest clue what you’re talking about… and yet, at the same time, I don’t really have a life. I’m sort of all things to all men… or no things to no one… or something.

      So I’ll be Googling this as soon as I hit “submit comment”.

  8. In regarding the prayers to preserve the city from the glacier, the Biblical account for the unfolding productive and interactive Work of The Almighty allows for the truth of the Prophetic reality of Biblical innerancy to fully manifest itself. Note that dark matter has certain fluid slower and colder properties which is in accordance with the writtings such that extant a formless and void earth with darknesss there was not light at that time. Therefore, since the wavelength of dark matter was mentioned, one could understand that these events may speak to a Spiritual Celestial Bodies such that darkness was separated right away as lesser light to rule the night or lucifer. Given the inifinite ways in which God’s Holy Word has proven true in physics, biology, mathematics, cosmology, geology and the other sciences which study the reality of Gods creation, I will not be surprised when glacierists find that prayers really have been controlling the ebb and flow of the glacier.

  9. Jack: Why do you drop the same comment (changing the opening and closing)? Why not actually put some thought into it? If you’re going to be a troll, do it. Don’t fake it.

  10. Hateful Coward!

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