A Wandering Mind is a Strange Mind

5 August, 2009

So I’m driving home from work (my first day back after a nice 9-day staycation at Frontporchville) and, on my Zen Mozaic, this came up:

And I let my mind wander ((((Wife))) says I shouldn’t do that — it is not mature enough to take care of itself).  And I began to think (and we all know that no good can come of that!).  Especially about the songs second and third stanza of the introduction:

I’m a Roman Catholic,
And have been since before I was born,
And the one thing they say about Catholics is:
They’ll take you as soon as you’re warm.

You don’t have to be a six-footer.
You don’t have to have a great brain.
You don’t have to have any clothes on. You’re
A Catholic the moment Dad came,

So if (and this is a totally faith-based position (and I am not really planning to argue that particular faith-based position)), as claimed by Roman Catholics and many Protestant sects, life begins at conception, the moment that the sperm enters the egg, then who is right?  What religion is the unborn child?  If any?

Follow my reasoning on this. 

Christianity is based on faith.  On right belief.  On orthodoxy.  One must believe the right thing about the right things in order to be saved from an eternity of damnation by the loving god(s).  If you do not believe the right thing, or if you do not believe at all, you are damned. Babies cannot ‘believe.’  They cannot have faith which means that babies cannot be ‘Christians.’

So every sperm really is precious.  Why?  Because without faith, without belief, one would be, at least, an agnostic.  At best, an atheist.

Like I said, letting my mind wander is a dangerous thing.  Strange, innit?



  1. Don’t most religions give a pass to babies and such when they go to that Great Pram in the sky? If so, then that makes your question even more important. Which afterlife do they go to? Their parents’? If their parents are Muslim, what does a toddler do with a bevy of virgins? Does each sperm get a pair of wings and a harp, too? That could very well cause an overcrowding problem of Catholic proportions.

  2. Where do all the virgins in Muslim heaven come from? Since the population on earth is pretty close to 50-50, how does every male-Muslim-martyr get to enjoy a 72:1 ratio – of virgins, no less! Furthermore, if we subtract non-virgin female Muslims from the proportion of those available to the male-martyr guys, the pool of available virgins is even smaller than the 50-50 pool they began with.

    I’m no math whiz, but the math on this one is, if true, certainly miraculous!

  3. Postie: Catholics used to send unbaptised babies to Limbo (Punishing babies for dieing to quickly. How low can they go?). Now Limbo no longer exists. No idea where they go now.

    Of course, each and every religion claims that they, and only they, are the only true religion. Which means only one could be right, right? So whichever one is right gets all the babies.

    Chappie: The virgins are created out of nothing only for the purpose of being virgins. I don’t think that they are actual terrestrial virgins. Or they get their hymen regrown (and (I guess) the memory erased) each night in order to remain virgins. Besides, only Muslim men go to heaven, so they get all the women of all the other religions as their toys. I guess that would be hell for unbelievers.

  4. Bleagh. Sorry I asked. 😦

  5. Chappie: Glad I could help.

  6. Hateful Coward!

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