These are Sick Fucks.

23 February, 2009

UPDATE (133524FEB09):  Upon further study (with help from comments) I have decided that this is either a very well done Poe, or a very scary site designed to scare women away from health care.  I lean more toward the latter explanation.  I now doubt that the site actually has such a database. The site, most likely, is an attempt to terrorise women into making a decision based upon guilt or fear, rather than what is best for her.  If so, it may be legal, but they are sick fucks.   However, the mere fact that it is believable says much about how insane things have become in the United States.

A website, called AbortionTracker.com (warning — this is a very sick site), has taken upon itself this mission: “We wish to help make the world a better, more conservative, wholesome, place, by God, so we will always protect your personal privacy above all else.”  Actually, that is their privacy statement.  And the privacy is promised only for those who invade the privacy of women who legally visit women’s health centers and send the information to AbortionTracker.

From their home page (with my angry snark):

Since the Supreme Court ruled in 1973 that the murdering (that would be legal and safe ending of a pregnancy) of unborn children (called, in the real world, foetuses) should be legal (because why should the government of a secular democracy use a religious standard to write laws), mothers have had the right to exterminate their children (again, without the inflammatory language, that would be an abortion) without so much as a second thought (come on, assholes — do you really believe that anyone other than a psychopath, sociopath, or True Believer Christian can have an abortion without thinking about the process and weighing the pros and cons) or the mandatory use of a “real name” (does anyone know that that means?). Every branch of government has heard the will (which, in virtually every survey, shows a minority in favour of legal abortions without restrictions, and a majority in favour in most conditions) of the people (I guess the people of which they speak are the True Believers)  ever since, and everyone agrees this gruesome (knock it off with the inflammatory talk, please) ruling  will be overturned very soon (not if the United States Supreme Court follows both the United States Constitution and precedent) .

But it’s still illegal in many (it is illegal in all  states) states to bomb abortion clinics (which are women’s health clinics and they do far more than abortions — contraception, treatment of STDs, education, etc.). AbortionTracker to the rescue (of AbortionTracker’s cashflow)!  We are an organization that has agreed to back off the issue, for now (bullshit! you have created an entire site dedicated to releasing medical records of women who have visited clinics). We still recognize murder (abortion) for what it is (a legal medical procedure, just like when I chose to spend three months in a cast after having my MCL rebuilt), and we permit the rights of infidels (that would be, I guess, everyone who does not think exactly like they do) to slaughter (have an abortion) their babies (foetuses) until the government comes to its senses again (which means turning America into a Christian theocracy).

For now, let’s just say that women do have the right to have abortions done inside them (where else would they be done?). Fine, but for now, we have the right to tell you who these murderers are (No, you do don’t;  these records are protected by federal law, as are all medical records.  For instance, I don’t have the right to see the records of the people maintaining this horror to see how many times they have been treated for STDs and drug abuse).

Our unique (and illegal) search database pulls information from a variety of 3rd party (criminals) and proprietary sources to compile a full, comprehensive list of every woman who has had an abortion procedure performed in the United States and Canada, dating back to 1940, in many cases.

Simply join our network, submit your personal information, and once you are approved, we will grant you access to our cutting edge, patent pending system. Before you know it, you’ll know your friends and neighbors for who they really are (Which the member can then use for, say, blackmail, or just to feel superior (can you imagine what a fundogelical church would do with a database like this to blackmail or purify the flock?)).

These fuckers are also 100% accurate:

Do you think your name has incorrectly been added to our database? We don’t think so (because thinking really is not our strong suit), and we should know, because our deep-file research (basically, names handed to us by snitches breaking federal law) has been tireless and unfaltering, and we are eager to stand by any of the results that appear on this site.

If you believe your name has been added to our database without merit, please consider that there are no (ZERO) errors in our database (has anyone, anywhere, anytime ever seen a completely error free database?), and we have proven as much in several courts of law and as many circuit courts of appeal. However, if you’d still like to tangle with us, here are the considerations to bear in mind: You killed a baby (no, it really is called an abortion, and it really is a foetus until viable), so you have no vote or voice in congress (anyone who has had a certain medical procedure has lost the right to vote or be represented?  When did that law pass?), whether in this world or the next (and there probably is no next world, so go pound sand).

You have basically no recourse against us (because crazy people who hear God(s) talking to them are above the law, right?). We know we’ve done right (in our insane world) by reporting you for the murdering actions (legal medical procedure) you’ve done, so we’re golden in the eyes of God (because God(s) (or some other voice in their head, or their minister) tells them). We’ve also setup all our critical operations in nations friendly to our cause (please name them (I’m guessing Iran or the Vatican (mostly because I cannot think of any other theocracy out there))), but if you still want to take action, here’s what you can do:

and then list some ideas, including how these sick fucks will get you.

I tried to peruse the entire site.  I couldn’t.  Each page, each paragraph, at which I looked was worse. 

I know that there are some lawyers who visit my site.  How can a scam like this be legal?  How can a private Christianist egomaniacal group get away with asking people to violate federal medical privacy laws?

These people are sick fucks.  And they embody the goals of the modern Republican Party and the radical religious right.  And they scare the shit out of me.



  1. I would guess that this is one of the reasons that some of the more “conservative” congregations require women to be “churched”. Keeping tabs on who’s doing the horizontal mambo.

  2. I think it’s a horrible horrible joke. A rather sick and shitty one.

    The advertisement page is kind of a tip-off, as is the “child-trader” link.

    I mean… this has to be a joke. Right?

  3. Truly sick and deluded fucks indeed!
    Surely if they have illegally got someone’s medical records (and I can only assume they have gotten them illegally) then They could be charged with some sort of criminal offence?

  4. Sarge: Some people really get off on telling other people what they can and cannot do. I honestly think that some fundogelicals have a better sex life saying no to strangers than they do with their wife.

    Michele: Thanks for stopping by. It may be a joke, but if so, the title still stands.

    Oz: I would assume so. But I know (through an acquaintance who has worked in a women’t health clinic) that fundogelicals try to get hired just so they can witness them, steal records, or commit sabotage.

  5. Regardless of whether this is a joke or not, the fact that this is something we even consider a possibility, then it means there’s something fairly wrong with the way portions of our society perceives women and reproductive rights. But I seriously hope that this is a very sick joke (what’s the abortion-reviling equivalent to a “Poe”?)

  6. It appears to be a joke, but I certainly wouldn’t put it past those right-wing “sick fucks” from attempting something similar. Thta is the scary part.

  7. btw, read the “Advertise with us” link and the demographics of their readers. It just gives credence to my thought that it is a joke.

  8. That’s an awesome bullshit site. Hilarious

  9. It’s the bit where they demand $4,000 to remove an incorrect listing that gets me. There’s a money spinner and no mistake. Bloodsucking arse-ticks.

    Mind you, the best line on the site has to be, “you can’t prove a negative any more than you can double-prove a double-negative positive, and that’s common knowledge”, which is a pretty surefire Poe-pointer…

  10. Beyond being just morbid, invasive and in bad taste,
    if this is for real, it seems to me that this fundamentally violates the Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act (HIPAA), a federal (USA) law. There are civil and criminal penalties for violation. Although IANAL, this seems actionable, since they are knowingly violating the law using private health information (PHI) they obtained. The DHHS website says (http://www.dshs.state.tx.us/hipaa/default.shtm):

    “The legislation carries heavy civil and criminal penalties for failure to comply. US DHHS Office for Civil Rights will enforce civil penalties that may include penalties from $100 per violation to $25,000 per calendar year.US Department of Justice will enforce criminal penalties which may include up to 10 years imprisonment and a $250,000 fine.”

  11. If this site is legit, I’ll eat my headdress.

  12. Through my limited and hobbyistic understanding of Federal law, if this site and its owners are real, I am fairly sure that they could be brought up on federal racketeering charges. This kind of thing is the product of sick and twisted minds, I sometimes fear for the country with these kinds of lunatics around.

  13. Michelle: Agreed. Another idea is that they do not actually have a database, but the site is designed to frighten women away from health care.

    DB: Part of me thinks it is a joke, but, as I said to Michelle (and added to the post), it may be an attempt to frighten women (that would be terrorism, right?).

    Philly: It is hilarious in a really sick way. Again, some women or girls could see this site and end up making a decision based upon guilt and fear, not what is best for her. If so, the site, while being fictitious, could still be extremely damaging.

    Yunshui: I got taken in by this one, no question (I am quite gullible). However, if it is humour, it is humour which could have the unintended (or perhaps intended) consequence of terrorism.

    Sillygoat ((((Wife))) likes your avatar): I now, after looking closer at the site (which meant I almost lost my homemade chili (that site is sick)) I would tend to agree with commenteers calling Poe. Sort of.

    Philly: It may not be legit in terms of the existence of the database, but it could still be legit as attempted terrorism.

    TauRaven: Thanks for stopping by. It would be illegal, at least for those removing the records.

  14. I think it’s just for the lulz, not for actually scaring women. Oh, and if some dumbass gives them $ thousands to sign up, that’s epic pwnage.

  15. Philly: Could be, but I’m not 100% humour on this one. It just strikes me as too likely to be taken at face value. Can’t you just imagine some fundogelical preacher using something like this to ferret out any sinners in his flock? Or blackmail them? Just telling them that the list ‘exists’ could generate some fast cash.

    Again, you may be right. I know I got fooled. The question is, mean-spirited asshole, or joke that goes almost too far?

  16. We track everyone, and we do it in a number of award winning, innovative ways. We have volunteers hiding in the bushes outside almost every American pre-natal slaughter house, and we troll records “legally” obtained from medical workers in these facilities who have since found the Lord (or whom always had the Lord, but only decided to deliver “borrowed records to us after the fact.

    This paragraph from the FAQ page pretty much gives away the game.

  17. Shit. (((Billy))) – would you be a gentleman and close my dangling codes? Thanks.

  18. Chappie: I was born south of the Mason-Dixon Line, so Ah’m Ahlways a gennelman, yal\’ll. Done. I think.

    I guess I just don’t have the stomach for this kind of ‘humour.’ Just finding what is quoted above made me feel ill.

    I still think, though, that this is very mean-spirited humour which could . . . Shit. Repeating myself.

  19. I just finished reading a hilarious book called “Defending My God-given Right to NOT be a Christian” by Jimmy D. Kuratz. It proves that Christian theology is only very loosely based on the Bible and that the Bible is a fraud! I am pretty sure that you can buy the book off his website: http://www.religiousbaggage.com
    I hope everyone loves the book as much as I did.

  20. (((Billy))):
    I agree with your opinion of this site as “humor.” It doesn’t tickle my funny bone, but it is a pretty clever parody.

  21. Angelo: Thanks for stopping by. We appreciate the non sequitor. And the commercial.

    Chappie: Clever, yes.

  22. I rarely blog, and I know its still off the subject, but I just wanted to say that I read that book as well and found it quite useful. It gave me tons of ammunition for fighting against Christians.

    And not that it matters, but it’s spelled “non sequitUr”.

  23. Tom: Sorry.

  24. this is, obviously, someone’s idea of a joke. a joke which treats a serious matter, the murder of the unborn, with a tastelessness only believable when one thinks of, well, the author of this site is a good example.

  25. Anton: Personal insults, now? My, my. That’s Christian.

  26. Well I’m against the murdering of the brain cells of the willfully ignorant, allowing them to atrophy and shrivel like raisins on the vine. It’s sad. The willfully ignorant should be tried for murder.

    What’s worse is they generally want more and more. Their hunger for killing evermore insatiable. They’ll move to kill the brain cells of their children, and then other’s children, and on and on.

    They must be stopped.

  27. The bit that gets me is that they’ll use the State to restrict (which I don’t have a problem with, as long as it’s in-line with Roe v Wade) or ban abortion, but are against using the State to support the born, then they’ll use the State to stop you from going out at a time and place of your choosing (Matt5:49 Blessed are the fetal in nature, and blessed are the nearly dead, but fuck those in between…)

  28. Philly: You are against murdering brain cells? No alcohol consumption?

    MO: What are you expecting, consistency?

  29. No, not really. The most I’ve learned to expect from people, relativists and absolutists alike, is pragmatism.

  30. MO: Pragmatism would be nice for a change.

  31. Pragmatism’s fine, provide we’ve got the same goals to not quite reach. It becomes problematic when others have incompatible goals, which it has in common with other outlooks. Oh, woe that is Man!

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