Wifely Witticism Number One4 April, 2008
As some of you may have noticed, I often inject one of my wife’s (many) comments into my posts and/or comments. My wife is the one with the sense of humour (some would argue that she would have to have a good sense of humour considering her husband (me)).
When I got back from Harrisburg, and wrote the post about the idiot who attempted to save me in the men’s room (paging the senior senator from Idaho), she tossed in one of her many, many, many funnies: “If they come up with a scratch and sniff Bible, I’m in.”
Then, of course, we couldn’t leave that alone, so we began ‘discussing’ the smells in the Scratch & Sniff Bible. Here are a few we came up with:
Fire and brimstone: what, exactly, does fire and brimstone smell like? Does it burn when you scratch your ash? Or is it more like partially recycled pickled eggs?
Noah and the Ark: Do you really want to scratch THAT page?
How about the smell of the Israelites after forty years of wandering in the desert eating locusts and not bathing?
Loaves and Fishes: I’m picturing a yeasty smell mixed with old fish? Do we really want to go further down that road?
Scratch and Sniff Sodom and Gommorah? That’s what got them destroyed in the first place.
The stable in which Jesus was supposedly born: a wonderful mix of dirty diapers, spit up, and that fresh dairy-air.
Can any of you think of any other smells for the Scratch & Sniff Bible?