What a Way to Look at the World

8 February, 2008

Some years ago, I found myself standing in a railroad museum.  There were both working and dead steam lomotives, plus one diesel-electric locomotive.  I overheard a father with two children (ages around 10 to 12, one boy, one girl) describing how the two different types of locomotive worked.  For the most part, his descriptions were pretty well done.  No egregious errors.  Then things got weird (I’m going to try to recreate what he said (this is not word for word (and my comments on what I remember him saying will be in [snarky comment]’s (sorry, no parentheticals in this post (except for these)))).

“Now, kids, remember when Mom was teaching you about  biology and how god created all the species?  Well, Darwinists [damn, I hate that term] try to say that one species can become another [no, the theory of evolution posits that, through natural selection of advantageous differences, all species are evolving].  In your book [and I assume he means the books they use for home schooling] you saw where Darwinists said that wolves evolved from bears [WTF?].  Now, according to Darwinists, this means that an old clunky steam locomotive can evolve into a better diesel locomotive [that’s on heckuva leap].  That means that there should be a whole bunch of ‘missing link’ locomotives halfway in between [if a fossil is found, its not a missing link; if a transitional species fossil has not been found, to a creationist, that’s proof that evolution is wrong].  Of course, we know, through our surrender to our Lord Jesus Christ, and because, by his grace, we are saved, that only a creator can build a machine or a new species [so, ‘knowing’ Jesus means you don’t have to think?].  Those engines were made by men.  They were created by men.  Animals were created by god.

“I have an assignment for you to do tonight in the hotel room [I guess no pay-per-view in THAT room].  I want each one of you to draw what a missing link between steam and diesel  would look like.  The Darwinist’s make up animals to go in between the different species [no, evolutionary biologists and palaeontologists study fossil remains and infer from those remains what an animal looked like], and this will help you learn how silly and misguided they are.”

I stood there, listening, with my jaw down around my toes.  The leaps of fallacious logic, the non-sequitors, the stupid, it hurt.  I remained out of sight (I wasn’t hiding, I just happened to be out of sight) as they went into another part of the museum.  Then I looked at the steam locomotive and the diesel-electric locomotive, and saw them in a whole new light.  I never dreamed that these different modes of motive power, by themselves, could disprove evolution.

Now all we need to do is find a steasel locomotive to shut him up.



  1. I admire your self-control. I think I would have burst into maniacal laughter.

  2. Chappie: Your not supposed to laugh at visitors while in uniform. Its sort of an unwritten rule.

  3. I definitely would have burst into lionical laughter. There would have been tears in my eyes and my gut would have hurt.

    I think it’s our sworn duty to laugh at these people. I swore on a copy of Baum’s Logic.

  4. That made my head hurt. Good thing I wasn’t there, I have a tendency to say bad things.

  5. So lemme get this straight. Are you saying that you’ve found the missing link between steam locomotives and diesel locomotives?

  6. Well that’s a job I would have lost. I would not have been able to allow that to go on.

  7. Ex –

    Yeah, it’s called a Lionel train. Looks like a toy, but it’s real. You can tell it’s an intermediate form because it runs on three rails instead of two, which is proof of evolution.

  8. But aren’t Lionel trains merely a shadow of the actual reality, kinda like the Greeks in the cave?

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